Some guy named Lance Synch?

Greetings Michael!

My name is Lance Bass. And to Dwight all I can say is: Yo! Thank God I found you! I think my career is in a tail spin. I heard you were in Burlington. I was told that I was booked to perform at a place called Recycle North???

Since I am in tune with the environment, I agreed do play it. However, Recycle North does not appear to be much of a venue as it is a dumping ground for unwanted bobble-heads. Some kind soul told me you were in town and has brought me to you.

Maybe with your help I can finally raise enough money for my space mission. In any event, we b-heads should help each other out and stick together.

Michael, this is Dwight. Help me, this guy is loony! He can't spell, says he used to be a boy band called NSynch? No vowels? In synch to what? He keeps asking me if I can sing the bass part.

I don't people like this holding me back from my mission of... um... whatever. Anyway, he's crazy. Since he came, all these teeny-bopper girls, like the ones who work at Ben & Jerry's have been following us around screaming. It makes it hard to sleep here at the bus stop on Cherry Street.

I implore you to send cash to give to this guy with a fake beard. Be a man and grow a real beard, none of this little facial stubble. Stubble is trouble.

Sincerely,
Dwight Schrute
Former Assistant (to the) Regional Manager
Dunder-Mifflin, Scranton Branch